


Remember me? Always.

by M00nandback



Category: Supergirl (TV 2015)
Genre: But also happy things, Endgame Kara Danvers/Lena Luthor, F/F, I am Supercorp Trash, Lena Luthor Knows Kara Danvers Is Supergirl, SuperCorp, SuperCorp Sunday, Supercorptober2019, Supergirl (TV 2015) Season 5, and as said supercorp endgame, it's actually Hope who get's Lena to realize what she's done, sad things
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-10-27
Updated: 2019-11-11
Packaged: 2020-12-28 12:26:26
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 3,591
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21136682
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/M00nandback/pseuds/M00nandback
Summary: What happens when Eve realizes how she can use Hope to make Lex's plan work. Will Lena be able to prevent the worst from happening and more importantly will Lena and Kara finally have each other?





	1. How am I this cruel?

**Author's Note:**

> First of all, this is a fanfiction so what's the deal with my mysterious questions in the summary?  
Second of all, this is full of season 5 spoilers as it tries to imagine what will actually happen in the next episodes (this is all written after s5ep3).  
Thrid of all, I wanted to post the first part on a #supercorpsunday so it had to be a little shorter… but I really hope you enjoy!  
\+ there will be mistakes, I'm not a native English writer ++ characters obviously don't belong to me (unless…?)

Hope sneaks into Lena's office. She looks around and focuses her thoughts on the security cameras for a moment. One by one they stop working. She walks to Lena's secret locker and opens it easily. She remembers the code because she once heard Lena open it. The locker is full of important looking things but what she's looking from there isn't that glamorous. After a bit of searching she pulls out three black notebooks. 

She lays the notebooks on a table and opens the first one. The first page says 'Lex Luthor's. Don't read. Somewhere inside Eve's brain appears an amused thought: "he wrote that as a joke. No-one would've found and read his notebooks unless he meant that to happen." 

Hope flips through every one of the notebooks and stores all the information. Especially that bit about his human mind project that Lena did not start to develop. Then she quickly gathers the notebooks and puts them back to where they were. She know's there isn't much time left before Lena returns to her office. She closes the locker and looks around. Everything looks the same as when she entered. Good. Now all she needs to come up with is an excuse for Lena. Not an excuse of why she was in her Office and how did she get in. 

An excuse for Lena to not focuse on her project so Hope could add Lex's bit and finish what he had started a long time ago. 

A couple days later Lena is watching CatCo news from her screen. She isn't paying much attention to them until she hears Kara's voice. Kara had told her she had another live interview coming today and couldn't forget about it. 

"She asks really good questions" Hope says from behind Lena. Lena startles "Hope! I didn't hear you coming!" Hope smiles, as she usually does when she isn’t sure what to answer. Lena focuses herself back to what Kara is saying. When Kara laughs, Lena's mouth curves into a smile. 

Once the interview ends, Hope shuts down the TV. Lena turns back to her "So what were-" Lena starts. 

" I see it now" Hope interrupts. 

"What exactly?" Lena asks wondering what new Hope has discovered. 

"How much you really love Kara." Hope answers like it is the most normal thing. 

"E - excuse me?" Lenas voice is suddenly an octave higher and she's blushing. 

"I've seen the way you look at her. You're in love. And that's a good thing! Love is good." she pauses for a second. "I'm programmed to know that." Lena is now staring at Hope, her face still red. She can’t explain how Hope had come up with this kind of thoughts when she was supposed to be focusing on their project. And how was Hope so sure how she felt when Lena wasn’t even sure herself.

" I... I never programmed you to feel, define or understand human feelings…" ...but Eve is a human and Hope has now all her experiences, she finishes the thought in her mind. 

"Anyone who watched you two sees it" Hope states. She does sound like Eve, Lena thinks. _ Is Eve trying to manipulate me? Is that even possible? _

_ __ _

"I just realized there's a small thing I have to fix with Eve's brain. I can correct it right now, it will only take a couple minutes.” Lena blurts out, not thinking any further. Hope needs to stop talking like that or… or the little boxes inside Lena’s head might open. She has no idea how she’s going to do it but - 

_ __ _

“There’s only one thing I don’t quite get… you’re still trying to hurt her. How could you ever hurt someone you love so much?” Hope continues like she wasn't listening what Lena said to her. Lena freezes. How could Hope do this to her? _She must know what kind of effect this subject has on me_ Lena realizes. _But how is that possible?._ She sits down on the couch trying to go through everything Hope has just said. She needs to do something to her. Maybe it hadn’t been a good idea to make Eve a part of this. Well, that would be easily corrected, she decided. She would just have to move Hope back to her usual form. ____

_ _ _ _ __ _ _ _ _

“You know that I only want what’s best for you, Lena. What’s best for everyone. And Kara wants what’s best for you, too.” 

_ _ _ _ __ _ _ _ _

“Enough!” Lena cuts her. “Stop talking about things you know nothing of!” Hope lowers her head, trying to look sorry. “Just please, give her a chance” she says quietly. 

_ _ _ _ __ _ _ _ _

Lena closes her eyes. “Please go” her voice is as cold as ice. She’s now so desperately trying to keep the little boxes shut that she can’t focus on anything else. Hope is right, whispers a small part of her and she runs to silence that voice. She can’t let her emotions show, not when Hope is present at least. 

_ _ _ _ __ _ _ _ _

When Lena opens her eyes, the TV screen has awoken. And Kara is on the screen. It is a clip from the news. Supergirl is saving something that looks like a plane. The clip is blurry, but Lena remembers what happened. She was there. Kara had saved her and the whole National City. Lena remembered how she had felt when Supergirl told her that she wasn’t going to let her go. _ I didn’t know that Supergirl was Kara back then. But Kara didn’t let me go. She didn’t want to. _

_ _ _ _ _ _ __ _ _ _ _ _ _

Tears filled her eyes no matter how hard Lena tried to stop them. She quickly looked around to see if Hope had left the room. She was gone. _But she made all of this happen. She showed me that clip_ Lena thought. And how much she wanted to believe all Hope had told her. _But there was no way Hope could’ve made this up. Maybe she actually meant what she said about wanting what would be best for me?___

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_ _ _The TV started playing again. Lena saw herself on the screen. She was calling Kara and then the Cadmus men came to her and dropped her from the building. And the next second Kara was there and she caught her. Lena still remembered what the falling had felt like. How strong and carefully Kara’s arms had held her. She needed a drink. Many drinks, actually. To stop these feelings. She was supposed to hate Kara, wasn’t she?_ _ _

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_"But Kara never stopped caring for me. She never stopped saving me, helping me, encouraging me, believing me. She never stopped loving me. Even when I hurt her she didn't turn away. And the second she hurts me I start hating her? How am I this cruel?"___

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A few hours later Lena called for Hope. She was still in her office, sitting on the couch and drinking her fifth, no sixth drink. This far she had been deep in her thoughts that still were mostly about Kara but now she needed to talk to Hope. A few moments later Hope arrived and tried to look surprised when she saw Lena. In fact, she had been watching Lena from the security cameras the whole time. 

“What are you doing, Lena?” she asks “ are you okay?”. Lena gives her a long look but doesn’t answer.

“How did you know this?” Lena says quietly. 

“Know what?” Hope sits next to her. Lena rolls her eyes and doesn’t answer. _She knows what I’m talking about_ She finishes her sixth drink and pours another one, waiting for Hope’s answer. But time passes and Hope stays silent. __

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A bit later Lena has forgotten the whole conversation and she’s thinking about Kara again. “Are you sure?” she suddenly asks. 

_ __ _

“Are you asking me if I’m sure she loves you?” Hope clarifies. Lena nods. “Well yes, I know that” she tells. She glances at Lena who’s eyes are now filled with tears. 

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_“You know, she’s tearing me apart.” Lena whispers. “first I think that I never want to see her again. And there’s a good reason for that. But the next second I think that I don’t want to see anyone else _but_ her.” Hope sighs. “If I were you, I’d keep her around” she says and leaves Lena alone with her thoughts.___

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	2. She betrayed me

Earlier that day  
Kara was sitting in her kitchen, eating potstickers. There were five boxes of them in the table. She heard Alex’s footsteps and ran to open the door. “Hi, I love you” she said when Alex handed her more potstickers. “What is happening? You’re eating even more of these than usually!” Alex threw her bag to the kitchen table and sat down. Kara followed her but didn’t answer. “Kara” Alex said tightly “look at me”. Kara sat down and put another potsticker in her mouth. She ate in silence and the crinkle between her eyes grew deeper. “I…. I don’t know?” she tried when her mouth was empty. Her hand was already searching for another bite of food. Alex moved the boxes away from her reach. “I said look at me” Kara lifted her head slowly until she was facing Alex. “I can’t, your stare is too scary” she chuckled and looked away just seconds after. Alex sighed. “Well now I know.” “Know what?” Kara looked up open-mouthed. “What’s wrong with you” Alex said and chuckled. Kara’s crinkle appeared again. “So you just looked at me for 2 seconds and now you think you know what’s up….” Kara concluded. “Yeah. So now tell me” Alex asked. “I don’t have to tell you if you know” Kara tried but Alex didn’t listen. She moved the potstickers to the other end of the table and picked one for herself. Kara sighed. “It’s Lena. I know she said that things couldn’t be the same after I told her I’m Supergirl but…” she looked down. “But what?” Alex asked. “I don’t know.. of course I wished that we could forget about the past but you know _ that _ wasn’t an option. I just… I don’t know. She seems so distant! And what she doesn’t tell me she doesn’t tell to anyone else either because she only has me! Or I don’t really know. I just don’t…” “You don’t want to lose her.” Alex finished the sentence. “ I know that feeling” she continued. Kara looked up and their eyes met. Kara didn’t say anything but at that moment Alex knew what she didn’t say out loud. Yet.

Lena wasn’t feeling any better. She had been drinking and crying, then drinking more and trying to forget everything. But alcohol had just opened every little box inside her. Now she was desperately trying to find her contacts because she wanted to go to punch Kara in the face. _ I could just call her and actually punch her. But it wouldn’t actually hurt when I’d punch her. Unless I found some Kryptonite… The earrings! _ She remembered one of the first things she had done after Lex told her Kara was Supergirl. She had made a pair of earrings that had Kryptonite in them. And she had worn the earrings when she saw Kara, just to make sure Lex was speaking the truth. When Kara had told her she wasn’t feeling good, she had known it. 

“Start the simulation” Lena said. Seconds after she saw a forest that was on fire. As she walked closer, she could see Kara in the middle of the flames, using her breeze to cut them. “Make her beg for my forgiveness” she told the simulation. The fire ended and Kara went to talk to the firefighters that arrived to the scene. Lena walked closer. “ Hi Kara!” she faked a smile. “Lena!" Kara turned around. " What a surprise! Why are you here?” Kara asked and returned the smile. “You idiot.” Lena said and her entire appearance changed. “Lena! What is it?” Kara was stunned. “I set the fire. Just so you could waste your time extinguishing it.” Lena laughed. “You’re not being yourself, Lena. Let me help you.” Kara worried. “I’m not being myself? You weren’t yourself for three years! three!” She cried and punched Kara to the ground. _ That’s what she deserves for breaking my trust. For breaking my heart.” _ “Stop.” Kara said quietly. “Sorry I couldn’t hear you!” Lena called. “Stop!” Kara said louder and looked up. Her eyes were in tears and she looked desperate. Lena looked into her eyes. _ This isn’t real. That Kara isn’t real. Real Kara wouldn’t beg. _ “ I know you. This isn’t you. Please, stop.” Kara continued. _ I asked the simulation to do this. _ Lena punched her again. However this time Kara rose up to her feet. Her gaze made Lena’s heart skip a beat. _ She’s so close to me. I’ve never seen her eyes so clearly. But they’re not actually her eyes. _ Then Kara started crying. _ This isn’t real. _ Lena couldn’t help it. She started crying, too. “I hate you” she whispered to Kara. _ Am I this person who’s watching her loved one break down in front of her and not doing anything? Am I the person who hurts the ones she loves? No. I’m not. But Kara betrayed me. Like everyone else. She’s like everyone else. _ Lena’s hand rose and she punched Kara in the face. Kara’s head swung back and she fell. “ You betrayed me!” She said wiping her tears. “I’m sorry!” Kara cried. _ This isn’t real! _ Lena walked closer to give the final punch. “Lena.” Kara whispered when Lena kneeled down to her. “ Just kill me.” Kara’s voice was hopeless. Her eyes searched for Lena’s. _ I can’t kill her. I’ve never killed her. I’m not a killer. _ Kara’s eyes met Lena’s and Lena felt something change inside her. She shuddered. _ Did I cause all that pain in her eyes? _ She knew the answer already. She had known it all along. The tears came back, and they felt like waves. She leaned forward and kissed Kara. "I'm sorry." She whispered, sobbing. _ I couldn’t hurt her. Because when she’s hurt, I’m hurt. And I don’t want to be hurt. _ Kara closed her eyes and took her final breath. _ But more importantly I don’t want her to hurt. Not really. _ “ End the simulation” she whispered and took the lenses off.

Dear Kara

I've moved away from National City. I'm sorry I didn't tell you sooner. I hope your life will be full of -

_ WHat am I doing? How do I continue this? Kara’s never going to believe this _  
Lena poured herself another glass of wine. _ What a stupid idea! _ She looked at the corner of her screen. 3:24 am. _ I’ll come up with a much better excuse when I’ve slept a bit._ Shaking her head she pressed enter and shut the computer down.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Umm... Idk about this chapter… what did you think? I think it's a mess. But I can't help it this was an important part xD. Stay tuned, I really hope you enjoy!


	3. Unsure

Kara woke up to the email. _ Who wants to contact me at this hour? _, she wondered half asleep. She reached out for her phone. First she noticed the time: 3:25 am. “What the-” _ It’s from Lena! She’s been working late before, but why would she send CatCo info at this hour? Wait a second.. Lena sold CatCo! Then what could she _ She got the email open and read it. _ What? What is happening? Is this a joke? Is she drunk? Someone has kidnapped her! _

Kara was already out of the window. She was re-reading the message as she flew. _ What is this? She can’t actually be moving away! Or could she? … Oh Rao don’t tell me she’s still mad at me! _ An unpleasant feeling swept through her. Next second she was calling Lena. _ What am I gonna ask if she answers? _ she thought hastily. But Lena didn’t answer. 

She landed to Lena’s doorstep without even looking around. She knocked three times. Without waiting for an answer, she flew around the house, looking in from every window. All the lights were out, and when Kara scanned the house she couldn’t find her. _ Where is she? Did I cause this? Probably. I’ve really messed things up this time. I knew it. _ Her hands trembled as she picked Alex’s number. 

After three long beeps, Alex picked up. “Kara, what’s happening?” Alex started. Her voice was tired. “I’m sorry for waking you up I don’t know what’s happening but Lena just sent me an Email” Kara fluttered. “Okay…” Alex tried to catch up. “It was unfinished but she wrote that she’s moving away TOMORROW and it sounded like she never wants to see me again and I know this is all my fault! Of then someone has kidnapped her because she isn’t in her apartment!” “Kara, breathe. It’s okay. Well, it’s going to be” Alex interrupts. “So she emailed you at what, 2 am?” She continued. “Yes! And I -” Kara started. “Okay. Okay! Shhh. Kara. Calm down. I promise we’ll find her.”

“But what if she’s actually moving away?” Kara asked hoarsely. “I bet she isn’t” Alex kept a pause, not knowing how to break things to Kara. Because unlike Kara, she herself was very much aware of what was happening between Kara and Lena. “I’m scared” Kara whispered. “You should go and check if she’s still at L-Corp” Alex suggested. “Right” Kara tried to sound hopeful. _ That should’ve been the first place I searched her from! _ “Call me when you get there!” Alex said just before Kara hung up. 

Kara entered L-Corp from Lena's balcony as she usually does. “Lena”. The second she stepped in, she saw her. Lena was lying on the floor. In a blink, Kara was next to her. “Lena!” she called anxiously. Lena didn’t react, but Kara could feel the familiar beats of her heart. _ She’s just unconscious, thank Rao! _ Kara scanned her vitals. Normal enough. She was safe. Then she looked around in the room. The lightning was dim but she saw everything clearly. Lenas things were scattered around the room. _ Has someone broken in here? _ she thought. Then Kara spotted the empty bottles. “Oh no!” she whispered. _ How much has she drunk? Why wasn’t I stopping her? What is she keeping from me?_

“Lena”, she called her again. When Lena didn’t answer, she carefully lifted her and carried her to the couch. Keeping an eye on Lenas vitals she took a blanket and wrapped it around her. _ She looks so small and vulnerable now. And yet she’s the most beautiful human I’ve ever seen. _ Kara felt her cheeks warming with the thought. She looked away from Lena, trying to clear her thoughts. _ Do I really feel this way about my best friend? _

Kara jumped up when her phone rang. _ Alex _, she remembered and picked up. “I found her” she sighed in relief. “Oh thank God. Is she alright?” Alex asked cautiously. “She’s… unconscious. And she’s been drinking. - A lot.” Kara whispered turning towards Lena, “but physically she’s okay”. “Okay-” “Alex I did this. I caused her to do this. We both know that. I just… I thought that maybe she actually forgave me. I believed in that for a moment. And I can’t help it I wanted that to be true!” Kara’s voice was unsteady and Alex could hear the panic in it. “Kara we don’t know for sure” - “ But she said that there couldn’t be any more secrets between us so she clearly hasn’t forgiven me!” Kara explained and tears filled her eyes. “I don’t see your logic but, Kara, listen to me. We don’t know. But if that’s the case then you’ll talk it through. I believe in you both.” Alex tried to reassure her. “Yeah?” Kara sobbed. “Yeah. Now go home. You’ll talk tomorrow.” Alex told her. “But I don’t want to leave her” Kara whispered. “You wouldn’t want to wake up next to your” Alex kept a slight pause, “best friend when you’re in hangover so believe me, Lena wouldn’t like that either.” “I guess you’re right” Kara whispered.

Suddenly Kara heard a voice that called her name. It was only a whisper. “ I need to go” she whispered to Alex and hung up. “Lena?” She moved closer to her. “Is it it you, Kara?” Lena whispered, her eyes closed like she was half asleep. “Yeah. I’m sorry if you didn’t want to see me anymore” she said quietly. _ What if she tells me to leave now? Can I leave her like this? _

“But it’s not you, really” Lena said, and Kara saw a tear rolling down her cheek. “No, Lena, it really is me” she told her again. _ This must be because she’s drunk. But why is she crying?” _ She took Lena's hand to hers. The movement made Lena slowly open her eyes and look straight into Karas worried ones. Neither of them said anything but Lenas eyes filled up with tears. Kara squeezed Lena's hand and couldn’t move. 

_ I caused that pain in her eyes. How could I? And yet she isn’t turning me away. Not yet. _

Kara didn’t realize she was crying too. She didn’t look away, and neither did Lena. “I’m sorry” was the only thing Lena whispered before she closed her eyes and fell asleep again. Leaning a little closer, Kara wiped the tears from Lenas cheeks and pulled back. Before thinking, her hand stroked Lena's hair as she rose up to her feet. _ What have I done? _

Wiping her own face Kara walked around the room and cleaned up. After moving all the bottles to one place and leaving a glass of water on Lena's table, she took a piece of paper and wrote a note. _ I really hope you call. Because I don’t know what I’ll do if you don’t. _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Another chapter, yay! I do have a 'storyline' for this but I like writing the chararters more... should I tell as little of the 'other story' in the future or should I just (mainly) keep up with Lena and Kara? What do you think? 
> 
> I hope you enjoyed!

**Author's Note:**

> okay I'm Still not completely familiar with the layout but practice makes perfect I guess...


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